Category Archives: Personal Life

May 11th

It happened again. That same date, the one which has haunted me and conversely fed my soul, has popped up again. A co-worker and friend has signed his retirement papers and named May 11th as his last day.
The date echoes through my life’s stream. My wedding day (and coincidentally Mother’s Day that year), the birth of two nephews and one niece in the same big family, and other less significant milestones. Now it’s back, another big event because I will sorely miss his company and counsel.

So I thought it was time to google. What else would I do? The first numerology site came back with information on why numbers repeat throughout life. And what was the first one on the list? Yes, my number 11. Apparently I need to read between the lines.

The Master number 11 represents intuition and awareness, as well as wisdom I possess that is not being properly tapped into. That’s a good beginning. Then it gets worrisome.

I must have an inner knowledge that I am not paying attention to and my gut is screaming at me to take a different path.

Maybe it’s because I dropped off my crusade toward a plant-based diet last week. I’ve been maxing out on comfort food with this bad cold and really hit bottom when I had that Zuppa Toscana Soup. But it was so good! I had no regrets. It could have been that recent glass of wine I had after swearing off for a while. It’s not a problem but I feel better without it. Again, so good – no regrets.

I have been fixated on paying off bills. I would love to drop that obsession but I am thinking that can’t be right. Paying off my bills ensures a better future for myself. I’ll put a pin in that one.

In The Atlantic February 23, 2016 article Coincidences and the Meaning of Life, the author notes, and I paraphrase, that Bernard Beitman, a psychiatrist and visiting professor at the University of Virginia, and author of the book Connecting With Coincidence, has found that certain personality traits are linked to experiencing more coincidences…..and people who are high in meaning-seeking are all coincidence-prone.

I have never felt closer to a spiritual journey than I have lately. I am boning up on meditating, getting my crystals in a row, looking at the larger picture of my life. But May 11th has been there for me for the last thirty years. If there is a message to be heard, it’s a hard one to shrug off.

Right now, I chose to think the universe has had it with my scorched earth approach to the feed a cold/starve a fever principle, especially since my gut is actually screaming at me.

As an homage to Spring, I think it’s time to push reset and begin again, and doing it each time May 11th comes back into my life stream is an apt ritual to embrace.

 

Credits:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/s/ref=is_s?k=connecting+with+coincidence

https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2016/02/the-true-meaning-of-coincidences/463164/

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Life in Layers

I’ve begun to notice that I am living off the upper layers in too many areas of my home.
I have a couple of favorite cups for tea, one for coffee. I use them, wash them, and return them to a cabinet full of mugs that rarely connect with hot water. Pots and pans seem to be narrowed down to the same two or three, and seasonings fill my cabinet yet only the front row sees any action, except on holidays, of course. I pull from the upper levels of all my drawers, and live at the end of the closet closest to the door. If I dive deeper, I am lost and find nothing I can use at the moment, so my favorites and best fitting tend find their way to the top.
I strive to simplify but this seems more like settling in. I’m not sure if my quirks are part of the march down the south side of my life’s midpoint, or just that my subconscious is tired of dealing with too much stuff.
After all, I observed my grandmother, and then my mother, create their comfort zones, moving the walls ever closer to live within their reduced world. And in stark contrast, I now watch my daughter dive to the bottom of her dresser in search of the perfect shirt, clothing flying the process.
I liken my foundations drawer – yes, it has all that stuff to firm and flatten – to an archeological dig. For anyone near my age reading this, I don’t have to explain. For anyone else, just think of it as all the ways we fight the jiggle when dressing in anything besides pajamas – and the stuff goes way back. Seriously, I gave a strappy tube top I used to wear in my twenties to my daughter who thought it was cool.
As you can see, I am fighting it. I just don’t know if I am fighting for a life of minimalism or against sliding into a new level of old. But regardless the reason, the struggle exists. And as I will have more “me” time this holiday, I will be able to jump on it and execute my personal scorched earth routine on some of these offending hot spots. I take a drawer, dump everything into a box, and try on each piece before declaring it yay or nay. Performing this ritual while a classic Christmas movie runs in the background keeps me engaged and helps to ease the dread of bagging things that haven’t seen the light of day in decades. But even without that distraction, envious visions of roomy drawers and cabinets keep me on point.
I should be able to breathe deeply and lay off at least some of my layered living by the New Year.

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I Hate Tuesdays

I hate Tuesdays. It’s nothing personal. Tuesday has never done anything to me. I just have this thing against Tuesdays.

I always hear that Mondays are the worst day of the week, that everyone hates dragging themselves to work after days of relaxation and weekend warriorhood. Well, I think Mondays get a bad rap.

I am well rested for Monday, walking into work refreshed, chatting about weekend activities and family anecdotes with others around the cubicles. I put in a full nine hours with gusto, attending meetings and getting it all done, after which I handle the rest of the day of drive home, dinner, dog walks, and assorted chores before bed.

My beef is with Tuesdays. I have to get up and actually repeat the day. This time, no one chats around the hallways. Everything interesting has already been said. It is just the desk, the work, the meetings, the drive, dinner, dog walk, assorted chores, and, well, you get the idea. And now, my energy is fading because I used up my weekend reserves on Monday.

Wednesday isn’t bad. Wednesday is hope. We have walked up the hill and peaked over the horizon at the weekend just over there. It’s hump day, the middle, when we start to crest the week.

Thursday is the slide into third base. For those like us who have every other Friday off, then for some, Thursday is their Friday. If I am off that Friday, then Thursday is my favorite day. Every task is approached as something I must get done before I walk out the door. In the evening, I am energized, sorting and straightening my home so in the morning, I can stand in my clean kitchen with a cup of coffee, watching from the greenhouse window the poor souls pulling out of their driveways heading for work. On my long weeks when I have Friday on, payday helps to soften the blow of one more work day.

I like my job and my company, and enjoy what I do. If only they could do away with Tuesdays, then life would be that much closer to perfection.

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